R&Я: Clueless

Cher: So like, right now for example. The Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" Well it's like when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I put R.S.V.P. 'cause it was a sit-down dinner. But some people came that like did not R.S.V.P. I was like totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, and squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day it was, like, the more the merrier. And so if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion may I please remind you it does not say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Thank you very much.

Cher: He does dress better than I do, what would I bring to the relationship?

Cher: Okay, so you're probably going, "Is this like a Noxzema commercial or what?" But seriously, I actually have a way normal life for a teenage girl.

Cher: Sometimes you have to show a little skin. This reminds boys of being naked, and then they think of sex.

Cher: Anything you can do to draw attention to your mouth is good.

Cher: Oh! Should I write them a note?

Cher: This is where Dionne lives. She's my friend because we both know what it's like for people to be jealous of us.

Cher: Suddenly a dark cloud settled over first period... I got a C in debate?

Cher: It's like that book I read in the 9th grade that said "'tis a far far better thing doing stuff for other people."

Cher: Daddy's a litigator. Those are the scariest kind of lawyer. Even Lucy, our maid, is terrified of him. And daddy's so good he gets $500 an hour to fight with people. But he fights with me for free because I'm his daughter.

Cher: I was just totally clueless.

Cher: I feel like such a heifer. I had two bowls of Special K, 3 pieces of turkey bacon, a handful of popcorn, 5 peanut butter M&M's and like 3 pieces of licorice.

Cher: So okay, I don't want to be a traitor to my generation and all but I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and like, we're expected to swoon? I don't think so.

Tai: Why should I listen to you, anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive.

Cher: As if!

Cher: Christian said he'd call the next day, but in boy time that meant Thursday.

Cher: I felt impotent and out of control. Which I really, really hate. I had to find sanctuary in a place where I could gather my thoughts and regain my strength...